When you’ve been in London for as long as I have, living in A Quiet Place sounds like just the ticket.

After watching real life Hollywood couple Emily Blunt and John Krasinski fight their way through their film of the same name, I might make sure to book a return journey.

In a post-apocalyptic future, we spy a young family doing their random weekly shop in one of those grotesquely oversized american superstores.

There are a few oddities though – they’re the only shoppers, there are no staff and they’re shopping in almost total silence.

When the youngest child of the clan picks up a toy space shuttle to take home with him, his father signs to him that this battery operated rocket is far too noisy to risk.

But as they’re leaving, the boy’s older deaf sister gives it back to him – because she knows it puts a smile on his face.

Alas, sometimes father really does know best – something we’re graphically reminded of as the reason everyone’s oh so quiet is swiftly introduced as our family head home barefoot.

I’d heard some pretty great things about A Quiet Place on its cinematic release, and it’s another recent addition to the so hot right now genre that is horror, and I can understand why.

Krasinski – who directs, stars in and wrote A Quiet Place – employs a very simple twist on that classic horror staple… silence.

Dialling the noise down to -11 creates a cinematic sleight of sound that amplifies every noise and scary scene, which no doubt worked even better in cinemas – where the darkness and collective experience of watching horror films heightens every trick and treat.

Unfortunately, some of this can get lost in translation if you don’t try and recreate the same atmosphere at home – so wait til it gets dark, turn off the lights and invite some of your more easily frightened friends round for this.

Other than this neat idea, I found A Quiet Place to be a little underwhelming.

The story is simple, yet often unbelievable – these creatures that prey on every sound you make and every step you take apparently have no weaknesses… even though it took me all of 5 minutes to realise that their super-hearing could also be their achilles heel.

And while I’d like to think working this out makes me really smart, it just means the plot is pretty dumb.

The rest of the story is an exercise in ticking off horror clichés, as a woman runs around an empty home trying to escape some alien invader, while we keep a mental list of who’s most likely to survive or not – by the time the film’s climax roles.

If you’re after some originality that’s more than pinna deep, A Quiet Place may not be the celluloid you’re looking for.

If not, turn up the volume and enjoy the silence.

Jonathan Campbell